Torture Chain [2012] Time Is but a Doorway to the Incinerator

Hailing from somewhere in the United States, Torture Chain is a (possibly solo) USBM outfit that breaks past the raw shitty stereotypes that comes with USBM and completely destroys. Acting as the band's fifth demo release, Time Is but a Doorway to the Incinerator is a 21 minute track of pure chaotic evil, and while I have yet to explore this group's back cataloge, from what little researching I've done it seems like this band has yet to release a bad demo. But enough talk, does it make Satan's balls explode?

The simple answer is YES. Starting off with a score from The Thing, the orchestral buildup is beyond intense and as soon as the music hits you're flung into 21 minutes of just gnarly black metal. With dueling guitars there is just a mountainous wall of noise bombarding you at once and with the occasional synth there's just so much to be heard. And with ACTUAL DRUMS that range from crust punk to grind to straight up kvltness there is diversity out the ass in this. The riffs are just endless on this, ranging from bulldozer chaos to fist pumping leads to just all around good frostbitten abrasiveness. The vocals for the most are an ugly, raspy gurgly black hole that when layered sounds like something straight from hell. There is almost no down time in the entire release and it's exhausting to listen to, for there is never a dull moment and things are permanently stuck on 10. The cool thing is how it all ties into itself, you get so much pack and variation in this that you never seem to hear the same thing twice, and considering it is 21 straight minutes that's a whole lotta material. Just when you've had your dose of crusty Satan worship you're flung into a calmer beat and some faint, however lethal, leads that sound like asteroids falling from the sky, you're pushed back to somewhere else inside another cold cruel nightmare. There are even soft ass Opeth like interludes on this that throw you off your game and provide for quality buildups and depth.  This shit is just good.

The mastering is good, especially for a demo. It's raw yes, but everything was properly set up to be captured and is layered in a quality setting. The guitars are just distorted the fuck out, but clean when they need to be. The drums are constantly in the back keeping pace and the vocals just continuously drag you across the musical grate, leaving you shredded beyond recognition.

SHIT QUALITY: GOOD

Kiss The Anus Of A Black Cat ‎[2012] Weltuntergangsstimmung

This album is nothing short of confusion to me, not because the material is drastically different from the previous Cat albums, but simply from all the press this album has gotten. Being a long time Cat fan I can not remember ever reading or seeing much discussion on this act, and as soon as this hit the shelves everyone is talking about it and complaining about the transition...which leads me to wonder if all these fans were in the closet or simply late on the bandwagon and are regurgitating the same review over and over.

Bitching aside, yes folks, it's a new Kiss The Anus of a Black Cat album, this time with 1980's post-punk pulsing through their feline veins to the very core. Now I really don't mind this shift to be honest, Cat has released 4 good albums in the realm of neofolk, so why not change things up? When Death in June is releasing piano only albums, Der Blutharsch turning to acid rock and Blood Axis are playing strictly acoustic, people should expect the unexpected when it comes to neofolk acts these days, and Cat is no different. So unlike most reviewers I approached this unbiased by the shift in sound direction.

Enough bullshit dude, what does it sound like? Well let's see, take all the heavy post-punk goth 80's hitters, a la Sisters of Mercy, Bauhaus, And Also The Trees, and modernize it so there's not that fuzzy 80's sound and you have Weltuntergangsstimmung. If you like your guitars to be fed through chorus pedals, drums to come from a 1983 drum machine and synth baselines, this album is for you! It truly is a throwback to the goth rockers of yesteryear and personally I think it's cool to make a throwback album here and there for absolutely no reason. The guitars all have that chorusy echo sound that give you the feeling of an abandoned old performance hall or a hazy graveyard and are flat out catchy as hell. The drums are all ran through triggers or are from a drum machine, it doesn't really matter does it, and all feature the classic percussion hits: clappy snares, tiny highhats and that weird Night of the Living Dead soundtrack tom sound that sounds straight out of the 80's. The bass is pretty neutral during all this, it fits the vibe but is nothing really stand outish, but again, it fits the era's sound perfectly. There is also plenty of synthwork thrown throughout this album, and what's cool about it is how it's almost a stand alone instrument itself, there isn't just one or two backlines thrown in to a track, they make appearances on the bulk of the album, and while they are a little on the minimal side, they are absolutely necessary for this release. Lastly comes the vocals, Stef's vocals are a stark contrast to the uber deep Andrew Eldritchs of the 80's, giving a cleaner, higher pitched, and often echoed Brilligesque approach to the music, which ties in traces of Cinema Strange and all those kooky death rock groups as well. 

Overall it's a fun album, there are some slow moments here and there but overall it's a fun little throwback album that took me completely surprise, and thankfully I am able to be an adult and not get all butthurt over the change in direction the band took. I can't wait to see if they continue this sound or transition into yet another version. 

P.S. does anyone else think of Unknown Pleasures when they look at this artwork?

SHIT RATING: GOOD

Failure Ritual [2012] Failure Ritual

This one goes out to all the possible black metal fans who read this shitbox who have no doubt read a few of my reviews on how critical I am of raw black metal.

Up today is Failure Ritual, a cavernously raw black metal/doom band from somewhere featuring one or more members who's names are something and something. I'm not trying to be cute here in my vagueness, although I am, but that's about all there is to dig up on this outfit: nothing. Aside from a BandCamp page I can't find anything else on these/this cat(s), so bear with me here on the details. I will say however that I do not feel this is black metal, yeah there are some black metal leads here and there and the vocals are something you would hear in a suicidal black metal outfit, but this entire operation reeks of Project AIDS style doom; but hey that's just my opinion man.

Details aside, what about the sound asshole? You may have noticed I labeled Failure Ritual as "cavernous", and frankly that's about all I can use to describe their sound. Imagine Sunn O)))'s wall of amps blasting out bulldozing walls of noisy almost Black Mayonnaise style riifs miles down inside of a large cave, and you're at the outermost opening listening in, that's Failure Ritual. There is a steady wall of fuzzy noise throughout the entire album that gives you a hypnotic feeling of sheer openness and chaos, but at the same time allows the guitars, drums and electronic elements to burst their way through the noise and give an utterly eerie beyond comfort level atmosphere. And coupled with the suicidal-esque black metal style vocals, which sound like a tortured soul moaning miles under the ground in Hell, the overall sound is haunting, immense and LOUD. The guitars range from funeral doom riffage to echoey Wormphlegmy leads that just progress at a snails pace, but in the most awesome way possible. The drums appear to be from a drum machine, and are not what you would consider diverse, providing the necessary snare and crash hits to keep a steady pace, but they fit perfectly into this style of music, so I don't see this as a fault at all. The mastering and overall production is fuzzy, loud and muffled to the utmost degree, but again, in the best way possible. All the instruments, backing noise and vocals blend perfectly in this giant vat of ooze, to which I have nothing negative to speak of. Overall it's just a fucking evil sounding album, that by moving at such a glacial pace provides a perfect avenue to suck you in to a hypnotic trance, an ability that most records are just flat out incapable of doing. I love it.

This 61 minute long album is broken up into three tracks, however some tracks contain multiple movements which to me could have acted as stand alone tracks. But for those doing the math, those are some long fucking tracks: 21, 28 and 10 minutes long to be precise, so make sure you have an open hour open to give this bad boy a shot because listening to it half ass will give you such a limp one.

Complaints? None really, this is an absolutely fun record to listen to with the lights off and a pair of huge headphones, and if you're like me you'll be flung into a dirty, freezing cavern within minutes of listening, it's just a fun and to me a fresh take on black metal laced doom.

Another awesome thing is that you can get this for free: check it out.

SHIT RATING: GOOD

Dead Can Dance [2012] Anastasis

A lengthy review of this album would be absolutely pointless, for I feel it's impossible to describe some acts out there, Dead Can Dance being one of them. So here's a quick rundown of my takes on things.

It's absolutely incredible, for a band that has gone outside the box and back time and time again, once the opening track hits you it instantly clicks as what feels right coming from the duo, as if the last 16 years haven't happened and this is simply the second half of Spiritchaser. However the nearly two decade gap has allowed for new and crisper approaches to music, and Anastasis showcases that growth from start to finish. With clean, damn near perfect orchestral and keyboard synths the duo project project you the listener right into the pit of an old European symphony house that has decayed over the years yet still possesses a few remaining players, with Lisa and Brendan heading the troupe. 

But enough of that, what else!? Well let's see, Lisa still sounds divine, and she showcases her talents yet again across this album. Brendan's voice has aged a little but in the best way possible, his vocal performances now have an even deeper connection to ancient heritage and everything arcane, and like his female counterpart he too showcases a full variety of different singing styles from almost rhythmic storytelling to bombastic lung exhausting singing. So yes, the two still got "it" and "it" continues to work magically.

What of worldly sounds? As with every other album you are taken from across the globe, stopping in the Middle East, the ancient Roman Empire, Asia and all the way back to Ireland, all in one 8 track 57 minute ride, and it could not be any more of a pleasurable delight.

How are the singing duties divided? With the reformation I did not know what to expect, but both sides get equal spotlight time, with respective solo tracks as well as a shared duet track. So whether you're Team Lisa or Team Brendan, you'll be satisfied.

Favorite tracks? If I had to pick three, I would probably go (in order as they appear on record): Agape, Return of the She-King and All In Good Time, which is a perfect blend of solo and duet tracks. 

Closing statements? This thing is just too good, and the denseness of it allows for you to listen to it for goes at a time and still discover something new, I am absolutely in love with this release and consider seeing them perform this album a few weeks ago as one of the best concerts I have attended, well done guys.

SHIT RATING: GOOD

EYeOvIsIs [2012] Into Thee Eye Of IsIs

Yet another blind download here, but going into it I expected another one man black metal band that sounded awful, but thankfully the name, title and album cover aren't indicative of the audio.

Where to begin, first and foremost, a background lesson: I have looked all over and only found minute traces of information regarding this outfit, and the only thing I can say for certain is it's a solo project from some gentlemen simply called Mr. Monster. Now if you look online you'll see this listed anywhere from industrial to black metal to noise, and as a fan of all three I can say this is not accurate at all. Yes there are some electronic elements in the mix and yes there are some black metal riffs from time to time and yes it's noisy, but not nearly enough to fall into any of these genres accurately. Okay enough bitching, let's get on with things.

As far as a general sound comes, imagine if Atooishinjuu, Genghis Tron, Crotchduster and Aborted all had an orgy after a Meshuggah concert and shit out a child...that's EYeOvIsIs. Musically the project is all over the place in terms of riffs and styles, one track you hear modern day polished death metal, the next you're listening to a Meshuggah-esque repetitive section and then the next track is 20 straight seconds of chaotic pulverizing grindcore, so don't get too comfortable because you'll be thrown from end to end while listening to this. Unfortunately as with most solo projects the drums and mastering aren't ideal, and while the guitars are for the most part well leveled and pitched, the drums are obviously that of a machine, and to be fair they actually fit the weird overall sound of the album, and to be fair again the drums are well programmed and executed: listen to this in a bass friendly setup and you'll love it. As for the mastering, some of the levels are a little funky at times and it comes with the territory of not having some hotshot director behind the glass, but like I said previously: it's not terrible or anything, and is acceptable. There are however a few moments where it tracks seem slapped together and rushed, like certain pieces didn't have connecting sections so they were just spliced together, again nitpicking here, but I definitely picked up on a few of these. Lastly comes the vocals, which I can only describe as someone screaming into one side of a dixie-cup and string telephone underwater, it's almost new age Aborted in style but awkwardly horrifying in an uncomfortable sort of way. The vocals range from straight out yelling to growls to even moaning out the lyrics, and even rapping for a quick second in one of the tracks. Overall they are neat to listen to and sort of fit the whole synthetic vibe the drums give off, almost as if the mic is shorting out and is on it's last fuse of life capturing the singer's audio. Last but not least, it should be mentioned but there are a few samples used on this release, and thankfully they are done right and are quick and to the point, so no worries for those who dread Mortician style sample lengths, they fit the mood and provide an outside eerie feeling between the chaotic playings.

Overall it is a fun, quirky approach to metal, and it leaves you questioning if the entire album is a joke or not, but all I know is that for 21 minutes I enjoyed this release and I would gladly check out any future releases this guy puts out.

SHIT RATING: GOOD

Avgrunn [2012] Conceived Genetically Perverse

Like you some Disgorge worship? Well this is just for you. Avgrunn is a four piece Spanish brutal death metal outfit who play in vein of California Disgorgey brutal death metal, and after some lineup changes, demo tapes and an EP, Avgrunn have finally dropped their debut album Conceived Genetically Perverse. 

Now I am not the biggest fan of brutal death, and to be honest I am not well versed in it like some people I know, I just know what I like and what I don't, and Disgorge is A-OK in my book, so their usual clones sound good to me if recorded properly and done right, and Avgrunn is no exception. While the recording quality isn't ideal, it is still leaps and bounds above your standard brutal death release, and all the instruments clash well together with the vocals, providing a harmonious blend of oozing groovy goodness. 

As for the music itself, the guitars are packed full of tight catchy riffs, the drums are a little standard at times but get the job done for sure and the vocals are on that fine line of crisp and gurgle, providing a strangely diverse sounding vocal approach across the entire canvas...even though they don't change much. As for bass, either I am deaf and can't hear it or they don't have one, but don't let that fool you, the music is a full bodied entity, there isn't much open space left for the imagination to complain about lack of sound, so fuck it, if having two guitarists is your deal, you go girl, it works..

The album is comprised of ten tracks, the first seven being all new recordings, leaving the final three from their 2012 demo, and while it is cool to have additional tracks, all three are heard in better quality earlier in the album and it seems a little pointless to include them, but hey a seven track release would have been half assed. But as far as the promo tracks are concerned, they're not far off from their mastered cousins, they just sound muddier and slightly less tight, but overall pretty much the same thing.

All nitpicking aside, Avgrunn deliver a fun little California style brutal death album and while they are far from innovative, it's still entertaining to listen to if you're bored with your Disgorge records and considering they are practically on the other side of the globe, they perform the style well, and do be fair, the performance is good, the recording quality is good, and it kept me interested all the way through, so it deserves a a pat on the back, I just wish Avgrunn took a note from their neighbors Wormed and explored a bit more into the genre.

p.s. whoever did the art for this needs to be fucking fired.

SHIT RATING: GOOD

Azaghal [2012] Nemesis

So to be honest I have never heard of this band before, and what sold me was the cool artwork, so I went into this with no real expectations, just a fancy for the artwork.

What I was given was some pretty decent Finnish black metal from an apparently well established group. Acting as Azaghal's ninth full length, Nemesis is a noisy action packed black metal assault, chock full of over-driven guitars, pretty decent vocals and drums that actually don't suck! Granted this is nothing ground-breaking or state of the art, but it is definitely fun and interesting to listen to, and considering how many terrible black metal acts there are these days who deliver terrible production and half-ass attempts, Azaghal have graced us with a quality piece of evilness. For those who are unfamiliar with the band, the band can be broken down simply: the vocals are a good mixture of Alexi Laiho and Shagrath, which I know are terrible names to mention but it makes sense to me. The guitars are nice and crisp, and while they could be a bit more dense and power driven, they fill the background properly and have some quality leads thrown in to the stereotypical black metal riffs that are expected from this style of music, and hell there is even a clean interlude or two thrown in to change the pace up. The bass is pretty much non-existent as to be expected, but it wouldn't fit well in this to have a dominating bass line thrown into the mix. And last but not least comes the drums, which unlike many competitors are real and actually decently tuned: the kick is a nice thud, the cymbals are evenly distributed in sound and pitch and the snare fits along with the whole concoction. There are some keys and effects thrown in throughout the album and they only add to the flavor, but aren't really a big part of the sound.

What kept me listening to Nemesis was that it never got boring, which I have happen alot with modern black metal in general. And while like I said earlier there is nothing really out of the box with this release, it keeps your attention drawn with many different speeds and directions, all while holding true to a singular approach and overall sound, and what I mean by this is that throughout the album you're presented with intense face ripping assaults, glacial almost doom like interludes and even symphonic ambienty sections, but never once do you question who's playing behind the giant mass that is Azaghal. So if you're into black metal and don't have a stick up your ass, check it out, if you go through your black metal with a fine toothed comb, you might not be that impressed with this release.

SHIT RATING: GOOD 

Triarii [2011] Exile

Seeing as how I never thought this album would come out, a mountain of anticipation had built up for this, so I decided to do a track review instead of the normal quick 2 minute write up, so here it goes. For those unfamiliar with the group, Triarii is a solo martial industrial project by Christian Erdmann that combines neoclassical and orchestral sounds with strong martial drum work and samples. The subject matter is a little on the risque side, so those of you who are overly PC may want to plug your ears for this one. 

Here it goes.

Monstranz:

The track begins with an orchestra pit warming up, complete with audience chatter and the papers of attendees shuffling in the faint background. Over the next 80 seconds the ensemble slowly begins to conform to the same on-key pitch and instantly it all ends, a moment of silence falls and in the blink of an eye the entire landscape is changed and instantly you are transformed into a scene from Triumph of the Will. With the entire orchestral backdrop in full effect it feels as if you are peering out an open window inside of a bomber airplane as it passes over the scar ridden battlefields of Europe. As the journey continues you are fed a healthy dose of choir singers in the far background, completing the entire WWII soundscape and just when you get comfortable, all goes quiet.

Emperor of the Sun:

Just like in the previous track the brief silence prior to the track is soon disrupted with samples of bombs exploding, intense horns and eerie choir singers. Once the mood has been established Christian's signature multilayer vocals kick in to complete the ongoing war that has erupted within the track. Much like in Europa, Rose 4 Rome and Ode to the Sun, Emperor of the Sun makes use of the screeching tire (?) sample that transitions into a wall of orchestral goodness. The lyrics covered in this track are similar in vein to We Are One, in that Christian spends most of the time labeling himself, i.e. "I am the king, I am the leader of heaven and hell", giving the lyrics an almost tyrannical aesthetic to them. As one of the three vocal tracks of this short release it is one of my more favorable tracks. Much like in Monstranz, the feeling of an aerial floating has continued to influence me the listener, giving me a higher more out of body sensation to the music's power.

Exile:

Now on for the title track, and unlike the previous two tracks Exile slows down the pace a bit by adding much more melodic synthwork and a steady softer martial drum beat throughout the entire track, all the while possessing the unexpected yet anticipatory high transitions in the music. Acting as a pallet cleanser of sorts, Exile's main job it seems is to remind the listener that war is not all about violence and bloodshed, but that there is a side of beauty to the bombing and bullets that make up the chaotic hellfire. While many of Triarii's most notable tracks are those with pulsating atmospheres and intense vocals and lyrics, it is tracks like Exile that set the listener up for such crescendos and without these softer pallet cleansers we would not be able to appreciate both the soft and militant side of Triarii.

Iron Fields:

With the mind fully returned to a peaceful place, it is time to get back to battle. The track begins with a wall of violin work perfectly placed between the steady thud of a perfect martial beat performed on deep bass drums. Once the mood has been established the song takes a twist with the addition of playful flutes, similar in vein of Victoria, and before you know it that booming voice is back, this time at a calmer more conversational pace in an almost Dead Man's Hill or Alle Sagen Ja fashion. Unlike Emperor of the Sun, Iron Fields is a much slower and softer paced track, even featuring faint clean backing vocals between the main lyrical portions of the song. There are absolutely no sudden highs or unexpected twists in this song, however there is a sneaky suspicion that this track may be leading up to a grand finale of sorts. For the usual Triarii listener this track may take a few listeners by surprise by how anticlimactic, yet interesting this track is.

Stadt Der Jugend:

As expected the bombastic bastard child we know as Triarii jumps back into gear and delivers a sample ridden track of something one may find in Across The Rubicon's closet. The orchestral feel of the outfit takes a back seat to a more digital sounding beat that provides a constant backdrop for the assorted sample speeches that occupy this track. While I am not entirely sure who is speaking, I can only assume the content is that of the Nazi regime, which gives the atmosphere a nostalgic and uneasy vibe to it, this is all positive by the way. After the first movement is done the orchestra jolts back to the forefront giving a perfect collaboration of the more synthetic beat and the organic feel of the orchestra, creating a wall of blitzkreig fashioned martial industrial. Images of perfectly sculpted Hitler-Jugend children danced in my head as if I were watching a propoghanda film from Goebbels himself. While I am not entirely sold on the beat that serves as the constant backbone of this track, the crescendos in this track are ungodly and bring back that feeling of soaring over Europe as explosions destroy the soft delicate crust below. As is Triarii's style right when you feel like you know what's coming next the track ends and you're left wondering what is around the corner.

Heimkehr:

And of course the next step in this aural march is another soft pallet cleanser, or is it? Starting off with more playful synthwork, the higher pitched sounds transition from one speaker to the next, weaving from your right hemisphere, to your core, to your left hemisphere, giving you the feeling that you are overlooking your entire fleet at a perched ground level, slowly overtaking the opposition. In comes the rhythmic drum beat, sounding strikingly like bombs sporadically exploding in the distance. The track is slowly turning into a rising buildup, with a steady stream of snare drums and choir singers, but what is different with this track is that there is something oddly missing from the track, and I don't necessarily mean this in a bad way, but it just feels like this track may have been left incomplete as so the listener could fill in the missing pieces and arrange their own portrait of the song in their minds, meaning the track is versatile enough to produce a different scenario for every listener. Much like I envisioned myself looking out to thousands of marching troops, perhaps other listeners will paint a different picture in their heads. With the track coming to a close it is anyone's guess how this all will end.

Solemn Vigil:

Unlike the previous tracks, Solemn Vigil's transition from the previous track is much more abrasive and intrusive, with loud church bells filling the opening seconds of the track, creating a constant pace for the song. Once the opening chants of the large church bells has lapsed, somber orchestral strings fill the air, and coupled with a fitting choir backing the track takes a depressing tone, one that is not really commonplace for Triarii. Christian's vocals come in, almost in vein to TriORE, recounting a message to that of a lost soldier in battle. This track took me most by surprise for the fact that the mood of the song is not that of a thriving martial war machine, but a serious and sincere attempt at recounting the upsetting reality of losing a loved one in battle. As the track progresses more orchestral pieces come into play and it almost gives the impression of a walking funeral procession or a military funeral being conducted before you. The overall theme of this song is not of war itself, and no true propaganda is expressed in this track, instead Christian simply speaks to a fallen soldier and praises his efforts. The track ends with one final aerial prospective transitioning the listener from one side of reality to the other, finalizing the entire ride on a melodic and balanced platform, and with that the church bells return, a strong wind is heard breezing through the soundscape and with one final strike of the bell the track concludes, as does the album.

Complaints? The only real complaints I have with this release is that I wish Christian mixed the vocal layering up a bit more on the vocal tracks. When you compare his other vocal songs you can notice a subtle change and it allows for each track to develop its own vocal vibe if you will, but on this one it felt like he kept the same presets and layering for all 3 tracks. Aside from that minor complaint I have nothing bad to say about Exile, except that I wish it were longer!

SHIT RATING: GOOD

Grave Disgrace [2012] Grave Disgrace

Today feels like a short review kind of day, but don’t let it fool you, this album is the tits.

Hailing from mother Russia, Grave Disgrace is a stoner doom outfit with old school doom/rock vocals. The band delivers walls upon walls of repetitive (in a good way) crushing grooves, cavernous Saint Vitus/Goatsnake style vocals and clean crisp production that will leave the listener to just bang their head in an orgasmic pulsing frenzy. In this self titled record Grave Disgrace managed to channel Black Sabbath’s stoner rock 1970’s sound and project it into a present day distorted clusterfuck of delight, without coming off as boring or flimsy like some throwback bands do these days. Overall it is a grand treat and should appeal to any doom/stoner fan.

SHIT RATING: GOOD

Der Blutharsch And The Infinite Church Of The Leading Hand [2012] The Beginning And The End

Fresh off their 2012 European tour, Der Blutharsch and the Super Long Name have dropped a two track EP to hold fans over until the new album is completed. 

>1. Untitled

Like something straight out of Pink Floyd’s ‘Empty Spaces’ this track opens with leading distorted guitar whaling over the droney rhythmic pattern of programmed percussion and subsonic synthesizers. Much like in ‘Empty Spaces’ an eerie and haunting voice chimes in telling a tale of theology and thanks, which may sound corny considering the artist involved but the track sounds like something Jim Jones would have listened to in his off time. As the song progresses more and more components come into play, allowing the guitars and drums to develop more into a cascading rumble across the aural spectrum and just when you start to feel comfortable the track putters out (literally) and fades into obscurity. 

>2. Untitled

Unlike the previous work the second half of this EP sounds more like previously released DBATICOTLH, or even off DB’s Philosopher’s Stone album. The track is comprised of a simple synthetic drum beat that weaves in and out of distorted guitar leads and inaudible spoken background sampling. While not as interesting or moving as the first track it is what I have grown to expect from Albin Julius. 

Overall I don’t love it or hate it, but it’s only two tracks and it sums up DB’s new approach to their music rather well, so if you’re like me and get bored half way through DBATICOTLH releases, this dose is just right.

SHIT RATING: GOOD

Haemorrhage / Gruesome Stuff Relish [2011] Hospital Thieves / Horror Will Hold You Helpless

After almost two years of no split activity, Haemorrhage are back to releasing split records on obscure labels, this time with fellow Spaniards Gruesome Stuff Relish. 

>Side Haemorrhage

This side opens with a heavy distorted guitar lead that follows into the signature groovy goregrind drum beat and before you know it Lugubrious is pulsing your ear canals with grimy and oozing vocals. The track itself is groovy and fun, with classic style choruses and overall it’s just a catchy ass track. The second track however is a more straightforward attempt at grindcore, with more of a drive at delivering blast beat upon blast beat to the listener. The guitar whaling in this track is really fun and feels like each chord stretches out for miles before being interrupted by a grinding transition. Again more catchy multi-layered vocals are showcased, this time with even more pitchshifted vocals, which is never a bad thing and with one strangulation style gasp the track finishes. Following in a similar fashion, the third track continues to more straightforward grind sound, with more guitar layers and an increasingly paced drumbeat that crescendos into a final ensemble of all that is Haemorrhage. Next is the GHB cover ‘Necrophilia’, now I had no idea how this would sound but they totally changed up the standard guitar tuning and it actually sounds hilariously good. With d-beat drums, guitar solos and Lugubrious just being the madman he is, the end result is a brilliant cover.

My only real complaint is that the guitars aren’t as powerful as they could be, they feel a little too low in the mix and would really make the music better if they were bumped up. 

>Side Gruesome Stuff Relish

Next up is GSR’s side, consisting of three tracks similar in vein to Haemorrhage’s work, but with the trio’s doomier twist incorporated into the music. The opening tracks consists of doomy bulldozer guitar work, leads, intense blastbeating and more raspy vocals than you can shake a stick at. The contrast in grindcore and groovier slow components keeps you on your feet and not really sure what to expect next. What I like about GSR is you can understand the lyrics a bit more than your typical goregrind/grindcore band, so it’s fun to be able to actually comprehend what is being sad. The second track features even catchier guitars and even some out of nowhere solos to mix things up. 

The last and final track splatters a ghastly scream into a fun clean guitar lead and sloshes it all around with in a mixture of haunting backing synths, sludgy style drumming and just an overall chaos of, well gruesome stuff. 

Overall it’s a fun side and complaints are only that it sounds like it was ripped from a vinyl copy or something, and perhaps that’s intentional but I just wish this side was properly mastered in a studio and was crystal clear, or atleast as clear as the earlier Haemorrhage side. 

Complaints aside, this split is fun as hell.

SHIT RATING: GOOD

Asphyx [2012] Deathhammer

Short review for this one, mainly because Asphyx aren’t known for having the most diverse sounding discography with Martin on vocals. But yes, Asphyx are back and to mark their 25th anniversary they have dropped the monstrosity Deathhammer for everyone to enjoy. If you like previous Asphyx albums or Martin’s work with Hail of Bullets, Deathhammer will surely work for you as well. The entire formula is there: throat ripping vocals, (good) tinny distorted guitars, slow doomy pacing and bombastic drum work that feels like sledgehammers hitting your ear drums, all wrapped up in great recording and production so that anyone of this still will love it. There are parts on here that are just flat out doomtastic, like on the fifth track “Der Landser” there’s almost a good solid minute of head nodding slow paced doom drenched guitar and drum work that go unaided with vocals, it’s pretty fucking gnarly in the best of ways. Overall the album has that beloved Asphyx sound and showcases not only their death metal abilities but also their amazing blend of doom metal as well, not to mention you can never go wrong with Martin van Drunen.

As far as complaints go, I just wish there was a little diversity, and I dislike how the album starts off with in your face music, which isn’t new for Asphyx but it’s still annoying. I really liked how on the first Hail of Bullets album there was the long drawn out introduction that built anticipation, on Deathhammer it feels like an introduction was left on the cutting floor at the last minute and left unfinished. But truly aside from nitpicking I enjoy this album and it’s another great addition to the Asphyx family.

SHIT RATING: GOOD

Киста [2012] Киста

I am not entirely sure what made me download this, maybe it was the Russian flavor, the interesting artwork or maybe just another blind download. Point is, I didn’t really know what to expect when I first played this. Now from what little I know, Киста, or Cyst, is a Russian death metal infused crust outfit with one pissed off agenda to share.

Trying to really explain this band is difficult, for they are at times fully crust and other times death sounding, but musically speaking it is a mix of Swedish d-beat crust and bulldozer style blackened death metal, meaning there is nothing but static drenched brutality in this delicious cake. And to top it all of, the vocals on this are 2 parts Thomas Lindberg and 1 part Trevor Strnad (the deep vocals from earlier material, not the nigh stuff), often times dual layering themselves to create an odd, yet fun vocal style that I haven’t really heard from many other bands. Take for example the second track “Иисус тоже любит егермейстер”, which starts off with a standard d-beat but then transforms into a spazzy Bodies in the Gears of the Apparatus influenced piece that then transforms into something I would expect to hear out of a modern fast paced death metal band who liked Nile or Morbid Angel. Point is, these tracks are all over the place, but the interesting thing is that they all fit perfectly and never go far enough to sound incoherent. And considering it clocks in at a hair under 20 minutes, it’s not like it’ll require your entire day to listen to it. Overall it is a fun album, and is on level 10 from start to finish, so anyone who’s into grindy or crusty stuff should enjoy it.

As far as complaints go, I don’t really have any, I just wish this was all in English so I had a clue of what the song titles were.

SHIT RATING: GOOD

Dia Frampton [2012] Red

OMGOMGOMGOMG DIA MADE A SOLO RECORD! As a big fan of Meg & Dia this really peaked my interests and I couldn’t download it fast enough. I had a slight fear that this may be something completely out of Dia’s range or style or maybe even just a bunch of M&D b-sides but I was completely proven wrong. The tracks on Red span from traditional soft spoken acoustic tracks to full orchestral pieces to 80’s style dance beats, all lathered in Dia’s spunky adorable vocals. There are two cameos on this: Kid Cudi and Blake Shelton, Cudi ruins the track but on Shelton’s track the final product is a perfectly shared performance by both Blake and Dia, for neither overpower each other and it just flows with perfect harmony. She also layers her vocals on this, so while it’s not exactly the same as the MegDia duo, it doesn’t sound incomplete or flat like you might expect, it’s all gravy, thick fun gravy.

Complaints? My only real legitimate complaint is the inclusion of Kid Cudi on this record. Having him be on the first track just starts the whole ride off in a shitty mood, but once his part is over it goes back to being a fun journey through teenage romance and tear soaked shoulders. At first I hated Blake Shelton’s cameo but by the time the song ended it all made sense, so kudos to that. The only other thing I can really talk down on is how short the songs and overall album feels, clocking in at a shy over 35 minutes it just feels like I am getting warmed up and then the ride’s over. But that leaves me wanting more, so I am not ruling this out as being completely bad just yet. Point is, MOAR!

SHIT RATING: GOOD

Ghoul [2011] Transmission Zero

Creepsylvania is invading ye numbskulls, prepare for war! The gruesome creation known as GHOUL are back with a brand new album, Transmission Zero, chock full of catchy crossovertastic riffs, fun as fuck singalongs, and pounding drum work that would make even the dead want to dance. The album starts off with a 4+ minute instrumental buildup and instantly transitions into one of the best songs on the album, Off With Their Heads, which is pretty standard Ghoul: thrash, crossover, jazz, surf rock, pitch shifted vocals, total fun, but this time with insanely fun singalongs to thrust your ooze covered fist into the air with. The album holds a pretty steady pace until about the 23 minute mark when Morning of the Mezmetron kicks in, which is a beastly incredibly slow paced, by Ghoul standards, 8+ minute ballad detailing the mighty being known as Mezmetron, not my must favorite track but it’s kind of cool to see them do something a little out of the ordinary. The album then picks back up with the title track, giving the listener three more two-steppable funtastic tracks to round out the entire vat of pus, blood and semen. The best tracks in my opinion are the ones with the gang vocals, that is “Off With Their Head”, “Blood Feast” (best track on the album), and “Metallicus Ex Mortis”. Overall it is a really fun record and a great addition into the ever progressing exploration of Ghoul.

Complaints? My only real complaints are that I wish the sound and production were a bit thicker, I just feel like I am missing a potentially heavy wall of awesome that was lost in the process of recording, but I have had that feeling towards every Ghoul album. Also, I could have done without Death In The Swamp, but I am not about to fault the band for having too many tracks. Aside from that it is a super fun listen and captures the greatness that is GHOUL.

SHIT RATING: GOOD

Entrails [2011] The Tomb Awaits

Strap in kids, the Swedish death machine is about to tear us a new asshole. Entombed/Nihilist/Dismember worship act ENTRAILS is back with yet another savory delight of pure old school Swedish death metal, only this time with Adde Mitroulis! Like the previous album, Tales from the Morgue, The Tomb Awaits starts off with a gorgeous introduction, leaving you on the edge of your seat waiting for the whaling impending wall of dripping brutality to ooze through your ears at any second. Also like the debut album The Tomb Awaits is insanely well mastered, with crystal clear drum work, ridiculous walls of riffage and the most fitting growls you could muster. The thing I love about the Entrails vocals is how they don’t try too hard to be brutal, they found the perfect middle ground of stale death metal vocals and over the top incomprehensible gurgles. Mixed with the fist pumping riffs and the groovy drum work this record is nothing short of perfect worship music, much like that of General Surgery or Impaled with Carcass.

SHIT RATING: GOOD

Dale Cooper Quartet & the Dictaphones [2011] Metamanoir

If Godspeed You! Black Emperor dabbled in jazz, this would probably it. With layers and layers of smokey dark jazz, this record took me completely surprise when I first put it on. I had never heard of this outfit prior to randomly getting this, and seeing as I am not that versed in this style of music I suppose this review is a little pointless. But here it goes.

Structurally the songs are all a hazy slow-paced vibe, with faint soundscapes weaving in and out of the tracks in the form of ambient loops and distorted guitar work, allowing for the entire album to always maintain a full and vibrant feeling while still projecting the soft and somber jazz styles that one would normally expect. The use of samples also really make this album a treat to listen to, much like in Skinny Fists (hence the GYBE note) there are scattered throughout the album short spoken word samples that give a depressing or eerie vibe to the music, and coupled with the assorted male and female vocals it provides a perfect canvas for the vocalists to weave their charm in and out of the smokey and bleak painting that is oozing out of the speakers like the cavernous monolith that it is.

There are never any really fast parts in this, nothing spastic or chaotic, but simply a rhythmic beat filled with walls of depth that one can rock back and forth to the music and envision being apart of the distorted haze that makes up this record. Coupled with the wide variety of samples, in some cases even showcasing machine-gun fire, Metamanoir packs the potential to take the listener on a deliciously smooth cognitive ride through the inner subconscious of our minds. Overall it is a really enjoyable record and perfect for late night listens when you have nothing to do but enjoy some quality music.

Complaints? I do not have any at all. If I had to pick something to complain about I would just wish for more eerie samples, but I am stressing here to find something to complain about.

SHIT RATING: GOOD

Absolutist [2012] Ave

Hailing from Ireland, Absolutist are a new and up and coming chaotic hardcore/crust band who flirt with styles ranging from d-beat punk to grindcore to WALLS of chaotic hardcore music. These guys released a 4 track demo EP back in March of 2011 and while it sounded energetic and chaotic as fuck, the music just fell extremely flat and didn’t quite have the punch that most bands in this field possess. To be fair it did appear to be an initial demo style release, so to judge a band on their raw recordings is a bit unfair, so I decided to check out Ave, thanks in part to the incredibly morbid cover art that I instantly fell in love with upon seeing it.

With Ave something fucking happened, like a god damn bulldozer rammed through their recording studio during the recording of this release because there are just walls and walls of chaos going on on these tracks. The vocals somehow are even more violent, the previously stagnant air is now an explosion of dirty grindcore style bass-work and the guitar and drum work fit ever so nicely with the ensemble that has been placed before us. Unlike most chaotic hardcore bands these days who just put the pedal to the metal from start to finish, Absolutist throw in atmospheric, yet chaotic, interludes and transitions throughout the entire release and help break up the monotony that can develop with many one directional bands. Some of the guitar work in this is just brilliantly done, there are moments where static drenches every instrument and and sound is erupting from every corner of the speaker yet dead in the middle is a crystal clear guitar lead weaving in and out of the falling buildings of noise around it, creating beauty in utter madness. The drum work on this is extremely fun for anyone who is a fan of d-beat and grindcore in general, because there are moments when standard d-beat patterns rip through a track and transition into a bombastic grindcore themed explosion and finish off with a slowly growing buildup nearing the next fucked up bend in the road, leaving you wanting more. The vocals are an odd mixture of Thomas Lindberg’s Disfear work and Mookie Singerman from Genghis Tron, so expect something a tiny bit different but insanely awesome when you hear it.

Clocking in at a hair over 21 minutes the Ave ride is over before you even know it has started, but your bleeding ears and clenched fists will show you have just gone through one hell of a deathride.

Complaints? I honestly have nothing negative to say about this album, it is a great step up from their last effort and everything I wasn’t thrilled with on their EP they solved with Ave and ripped me a new asshole. Plus it’s 21 minutes of pulverizing chaotic hardcore, you can’t complain about that.

SHIT RATING: GOOD

Pussy Juice Mixer [2012] Eat My Friend!

Pussy Juice Mixer is a Russian groove n’ gore pornogrind outfit with a few previous EPs under their belts, none of which I have heard. Finding background information on PJM is incredibly difficult, and all that came up in google was a russian community website, note: I do not speak Russian. So I am going to go ahead and assume this is a solo project, or at the very most a Jesus Crost type duo. But hey, don’t slaughter me if I don’t get this right.

As for the music, I know I literally just shit on digital drums and one man bands in my previous post, but Pussy Juice Mixer managed to crawl out from the garbage pile and produce a quality grind product without all the gimmicks and annoying features that most bedroom bands possess. And while I wouldn’t agree that this is so much of a pornogrind sound like all the blogs and sites are suggesting, there is definitely a heavy Gut vibe going with Pussy Juice Mixer, and with the addition of a groovy Spasm/Rompeprop overall style it is just plain fun to sit back and imagine twostepping to these tunes at OEF. 

Another thing I liked about Eat My Fried! is how each track is distinguishable from the rest of the record, and granted this is only a 15 minute EP but there wasn’t a single moment on this release where I felt bored or like I was hearing rehashed material, which can be rare for music this style.

Production wise Eat My Friend! is really well put together, the drums are clear, the guitar and bass work are filled with bulldozery richness and the vocals sit perfectly atop all this in the perfect pitch, not too low and not too high in the mix. There is however a track or two that sounds like it was recorded in another studio or sitting and the mixing is a little off, but as a whole Eat My Friend!’s production is pretty good considering the standard for this style of music.

Overall it is a fun little grindy treat, almost like an appetizer to start your day off on the right foot and with Eat My Friend! clocking in at 15 minutes, you really have nothing to lose by giving this a try, worst case scenario you lose 15 minutes that would have otherwise been used surfing porn.

SHIT RATING: GOOD

Stoned Jesus [2012] Seven Thunders Roar

As one can imagine from the title, Stoned Jesus is a stoner doom band hailing from the Ukraine. Formed in 2009 they have an earlier full length and a handful of demos and eps under their belts. Musically Stoned Jesus is a delicious blend of Black Sabbath groovage and Sleep’s wall of doom, all wrapped up into a fun little headbanging and fistpumping package. Consisting of 5 tracks totaling to a hair under 48 minutes, Seven Thunders Roar is a collossal compilation of fun stoner rock and new and old doom. So if Black Sabbath + Saint Vitus + Goatsnake + Sleep = your kind of math, then this release is surely for you.

To me when it comes to stoner doom, the vocals are essential in deciding if the band is good or not, and while I must admit that when the album first started I wasn’t a fan of the Saint Vitus/Goatsnake vibes but by track 2 I was in love with them. So if you run into this problem just keep listening, they’ll click eventually. The guitar and bass on this is just fucking destructive, and at times it just sounds like the strings are being rattled against the necks in a frenzy of marijuana induced madness. It’s pretty fucking good, I won’t lie. The drum work on this is what you would expect from this style of music, but all the drums are recorded in a perfect level and they are so fucking slow at times that your neck begins to cramp in anticipation of the next snare hit. Again, this is fucking good folks. There is also some fun acoustic work on this release as well, heard in the 13 fucking minute track ‘I’m The Mountain’, which is a more experimental track in my opinion, furthering their embrace of psychedelic influences and sounds.

As for how this release relates to earlier works, I have only listened to their other full length, so in terms of First Communion, Seven Thunders Roar is a much cleaner sounding beast, dropping the noisy Sleep style riffage and sound and exchanging it instead for a catchier, groovier and more upbeat style of performance. So if you were a fan of their earlier Sabbathy work, you might notice a slight change. Also where FC’s vocals were too low in the mix, in Seven Thunders Roar the vocals are little high and distant from the rest of the sludgy music. While this is not a major issue, and you adjust by the end of the first track, I just wish it didn’t sound so disconnected from the instrumental aspect of the record.

Overall it is a really fun release and aside from a few technical mastering complaints there is absolutely nothing wrong with this release. So go get this, light up a bowl or whatever it is you crazy kids do these days and get fucking stoned jesus.

SHIT RATING: GOOD